What an absolute stinker. You know when the average is 38 that the scores were going to be low… but wow. I was raped. Perma-captain RVP showed why everyone should find a way of getting him into their time, while a few big matches sparked plenty of talking points.
Aston Villa 1 – 1 Norwich
A bit of a meh fixture to start us off, which saw Villa new boy Benteke again show why he is becoming very highly rated at Villa Park with a beautiful touch and finish. Villa looked like cruising home before Bennett was sent off for a second bookable offence (rightly so.) From then on in Norwich did all the attacking, with Hoolahan, Holt and Snodgrass looking lively. It came down to a flicked corner from the maligned Turner to make it 1-1, before Guzan kept Villa with one point by denying Holt when they were 1 on 1.
Arsenal 1 – 0 QPR
Firstly… Sagna is baaaaack. Bad luck Jenkinson owners. Trade him now so he doesn’t drop in price! Wenger really needs to look at his tactics. How one of the big four clubs needs 84 minutes to get a leg up on the bottom team in the league is baffling. Especially when players of the calibre of Cazorla and Podolski in the offensive third. It was looking like heading for a 0-0 before Mbia‘s brainfade reduced the visitors to ten men… and even then they still didn’t look like going away. Mackie danced around three defenders before firing a shot straight at Mannone in what was the best chance of the day for QPR. So what do Arsenal need to do to get some fluency in their attack? In my opinion, Walcott is a lot better on a wing then Gervinho. Get him starting.
Reading 3 – 3 Fulham
Two words. Goal Fest. It poses the question though, what the hell do Reading have to do to register a win at home? In what was a very open game, Fulham looked comfortable, with Ruiz and Berbatov looking dominant. The one player who is catching my eye from Fulham is Baird. He has scored in the last two weeks, and plays in the centre of the midfield for Fulham. Why does he catch my eye then? He’s listed as a defender…at 4.4, you could do much worse! For Reading, the goalscorers were not really fantasy relevant, but Shorey seems to have locked down the LB role and chipped in with an assist.
Stoke 0 – 0 Sunderland
Was this game going to ever end any other way? Boooorrriiiiing. Shawcross and Mignolet owners will take the clean sheet with a smile, as will Begovic and Cuellar suitors. Apart from that…gosh Stoke are boring. At least I know now never ever to watch them play.
Wigan 2 – 1 West Ham
Wigan normally don’t thrive at home, while West Ham love shutting up shop away. Clean sheets ahoy I thought! But no. McArthur and Ramis slotted home before Tomkins made the scoreline look a little more respectable. Jaaskelainen owners… this looks like his last easy fixture in a while, so I would consider a trade if you have a few lying around. Wigan have been playing good football lately… and makes me think that Kone and Maloney might just be worth the investment.
Man City 1 – 0 Swansea
Very unconvincingly, City emerged with the three points, thanks to a superb Tevez 30 yard wonderstrike. Hart had kept them in it with a few reactionary saves, as Richards left the ground with a knee injury shortly after Vorm was stretchered off. Fun fact, at 102 minutes, it was the longest PL game in history. Michu looked lively and had a few chances, but Mancini will be coming under heavy scrutiny for the team he fielded, the 3 at the back system is clearly not working, and Kolarov is not good enough to play as a midfielder.
Everton 2 – 2 Liverpool
Oh boy. My mate Coops is fuming at this one. After going 2-0 thanks to a Baines own goal and a Suarez finish, Everton fought back as Osman continued his impressive run with another goal, before Naismith helped equalise. This was all in the first half mind you. Suarez then had an injury time winner denied as the linesman incorrectly ruled him offside. If you haven’t seen Suarez‘s first goal celebration, watch it. In response to Moyes saying that he was a diver, after he scored he ran straight over to him and performed a well rehearsed swallow dive in front of the Scotsman. Another Merseyside Derby not shy of controversy it seems.
Newcastle 2 – 1 West Brom
As soon as you see Newcastle have scored, you just have to presume it was Demba Ba. The Senegalese international put the magpies 1-0 with a crisp volley, before on loan Chelsea boy Lukaku nodded home an equaliser. With the game seemingly destined to end 1-1, Cisse scored what can only be described as the luckiest goal I have ever seen. Ameobi‘s shot ricocheted straight into the back of Cisse, which then forced the ball to loop over a helpless Foster. In true strike style, Cisse claimed it and ran off to celebrate. Ridiculous stuff.
Southampton 1 – 2 Tottenham
The Spurs recovered from the Derby last week and looked like cruising ahead after a first half where Bale and Dempsey put them two nil up. In the second half however, Southampton looked a different team, and pegged one back through Rodriguez. Jay then went close about a minute later, as Southampton dominated and shocked a previously unchallenged Tottenham outfit. For Spurs, Defoe and Bale are looking like viable options, as Dempsey is showing he’s cemented a spot in the XI and is back to his poacher’s best.
Chelsea 2- 3 The Protected Species
If you’re a Manchester United fan, close the window now, because I already hate you. After luckily going ahead through RVP via David Luiz‘s back, Valencia was allowed too much space down the left, and cut one back to that man RVP again to equalise on his RIGHT FOOT! (Yes you read that correctly.) Mata then pegged one back with an exquisite free kick just before half time. After the half, Oscar and Mata combined before Ramires rose over Cleverley to nod home. 2-2 with 40 minutes left. It was shaping up to be a cracker. Enter Mark Clattenberg. I’ll agree, the Ivanovic red card was completely warranted- Young was the last man and he pulled him down. But to then dismiss Torres for a dive which he didn’t even see is ridiculous. Evans clipped him, and while Torres arguably could have stumbled and regained his feet, he went down. It was another case of 12 Man United players on the pitch, and while Chelsea had 9, it was always going to be tough to keep them out for about half an hour. They could have done it though, had it not been for an OFFSIDE Hernandez, which was so aptly missed by the linesman. So, Man United walk away with another 3 points they didn’t deserve. Deja Vu anybody?
Rant over. In what was a shocking week for me, where I had only 1 player register an attacking return, I scored miserably. To rub salt in the wounds my team was robbed and RVP helped them do it…I really need to get him in.
Captain: Cazorla (Last time I swear to god)
Loser: Clattenburg / The FA
Cheers guys, hope your weekend was substantially better than mine.