After a hectic Christmas period and my gallivanting through Europe with a backpack it’s finally time for another edition of what we learnt!
- Liverpool are to Norwich what Michael Jackson is to little boys- they just annihilate them.
- Hughton will never ever start without Hoolahan and Pilkington again.
- Fulham are about as useful as an inflatable dartboard away from home.
- Man City have now won every game since Yaya Toure left.
- If Pardew gets sacked he will only receive 1 year’s compensation. Watch out Alan.
- Papiss Cisse couldn’t hit water if he fell out of a boat.
- Le Fondre must be mates with Russell Brand- in 7 minutes he scored twice.
- Stoke have now conceded 13 in 4 games. Leaky!
- Michael Owen has been ruled out for 6 weeks with concussion following his headed goal v Swansea.
- Julio Cesar starred in goals for QPR- highlighting again how bad of a signing Rob Green was.
- Benteke’s thirst for goals makes him sweat more than a blind lesbian in a fish shop.
- Essentially, Liverpool have gained 38 million pounds and Sturridge for Fernando Torres.
- I felt sick about that previous stat before I realised they spent most of that 38 million on Andy Carroll. Justice is restored.
- Arsene Wenger claimed his side should have had a penalty, before later admitting he didn’t see the incident. Again.
- Forget the term “whinging Pom”, Sir Alex Ferguson gives Scottish people that tag.
- Puncheon should have laid off the vindaloo the night before a game.
That’s all I learnt this week, let me know what I missed in the comments!