What We Learnt: GameWeek 30

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Shit week. Shit score. That’s what I learnt in short. But what did I learn in detail?


  • I can score more points from 6 games than I can from 10.
  • Manchester City is an anagram for “I’m Shy, can’t erect”.
  • Man United are so far on top they’re giving themselves nosebleeds.
  • Stoke City manager Tony Pulis confirmed he is interested in signing the Welsh backline which just won the Six Nations.
  • Arsenal have kept two clean sheets since dropping Vermaelen.
  • Andy Carroll has scored more 2013 goals than RVP.
  • Fabregas, Iniesta and Xavi have 20 goals 34 assists between them this year…Mata, Hazard and Oscar have 39 goals and 48 assists.
  • A sneeze could make Gareth Bale fall over and roll around like a little girl.
  • QPR and Reading are as fucked as a drunk child in a church.
  • Ba missed more chances to score than Bert Newton in a retirement village.
  • RVP has now gone 6 games without scoring.
  • Falcao’s proposed move to Chelsea has been postponed after his wife couldn’t agree personal terms with John Terry.


That’s all I learnt this week- let me know what you learnt below! Cheers guys





One comment on “What We Learnt: GameWeek 30

  1. The Plagiarist says:

    John Terry gag absolute gold. Have to practice using it as though I just made it up.

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